Have you ever had something planned in your mind....so perfectly....that when it happens it can't possibly live up to the expectation that was created? Well, this happens to me more than I would care to admit. It's not anyone's fault but my own. I have always, since the beginning of my memories, played out days, events, situations in my mind and I expect them to go a certain way. And when they don't, I get disappointed. *I know what you're thinking...but bear with me.* It's my own fault. Have I not learned in 25 years of living that NOTHING goes according to plan, especially made-up things in my own head!
My "first" Mother's Day was not full of the pampering and things I had desperately wanted. Although I got a card from my husband, I expected a sentimental gift. You know a keepsake piece of jewelry, a tree or plant that we could watch grow over the years, a handmade something from Presley, etc. My husband said he didn't know that he was supposed to get me anything. I guess because I'm not his mother! But I was super disappointed. Anyway, I'm sure this sounds completely selfish and materialistic to most of you. And you're right, it is. But I'm laying it all on the line and being completely honest.
So after crying about it and wallowing in my emotions for long enough, I decided to make the end of my first Mother's Day the best it could be. I looked at some precious pictures of Presley, read a blog about a Mom who just lost her baby 2 weeks ago (boy that made me feel like crap for being selfish) and made a gratitude list. I know how incredibly blessed I am to have healthy, beautiful daughter. I see critically ill children every week at my job (some of which never recover) so, I know how bad things could really be. And in the end, none of this stuff matters...not even that Presley and I didn't get a picture together to commemorate the day. So that's it......I'm done. Being a mommy has been the most incredible experience of my life. I should feel like everyday is my Mother's Day!
Oh, and I think I'll buy myself a keepsake piece of jewelry....but it'll be from Presley of course! ;)
The Sunday Edit
4 days ago
3 comments:
Um....you are not alone...haha! And I'm totally buying one of those stamped metal necklaces on my own. I've been begging for one, so my sweet son will get one for me! :)
Dad's have no clue really. I kept saying I wanted the same kind of jewelry haha and I got a locket. Felt bad though cause Trenten picked it out!
Your not alone at all with that playing things out in your head. I do that all the time and get really disappointed when things dont go the way I hoped. Maybe its a woman thing. I say buy something for yourself (thats the only way I get what I want). Presley is such a cute little girl, its sad how fast they grow!
-Michellene @ http://princesscouturedesigns.blogspot.com/
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